Getting Married

>Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant
with
>friends. You order what you want then, when you see what
the other
>person has, you wish you had ordered that.
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>
>Man: Is there any way for long life?
>Dr: Get married.
>Man: Will it help?
>Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.
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>
>Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
>It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands
before the fight
>begins!
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>
>Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
>Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.
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>
>It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.
>It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being
murdered.
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>
>It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such
beautiful things as
>women and then he turns them into Wives.
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>
>If u r married please ignore this msg,
>for everyone else: Happy Independence Day
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>
>Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking
about
>something you say.
>After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish.
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>
>There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster
than
>electronic banking. It's called marriage.
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>
>Girlfriends r like chocolates,
>taste good anytime.
>Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
>Husbands r like Dal RICE, eaten when there's no choice.
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>
>Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or
cremated?
>Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the
ash.
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>
>Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The
Master of
>Women'?
>Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side,
sir.
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>
>Q: Why dogs don't marry?
>A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!
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>
>There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her
so much that
>he would go through hell for her. They got married and
now he is
>going thru hell.
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>
>Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying
& the
>other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your
life!
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>
>Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?
>A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for
the same
>offence!